Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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