Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
