i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
