ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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