first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
