very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
