i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
