Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
