My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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