Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
