She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
