All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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