so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
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