Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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