Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
