He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
