We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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