I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I wish you could order shots online.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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