Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize