her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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