just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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