i'm signing you up for texting rehab
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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