Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
a search helicopter?!
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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