His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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