It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Less talking, more tequila
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize