Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
She said her name was "party"
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
