Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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