Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize