i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
