The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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