i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
she pinky promised me she was 18
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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