Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize
