it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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