i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
