Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
