I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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