Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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