Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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