So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
