How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize