Non-Jews are for practice
Is it because I queefed?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize