it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'm passing your future prison.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
