well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
