you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize