is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I need water and some morals
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize