He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I have fence marks all over my body
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize