so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
