if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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