just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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