R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Randomize
