I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize
