she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize